Truth and Love

We were all young once

All in love–

with the idea of love

A creation of the mind

Based on stories we grew up hearing

“he’ll come riding a white horse.”

“she’ll be the damsel you need to save.”

Adolescent, we search

For the image engraved.

And sometimes there’s a happy ending

And other cases….

Disappointment and heartbreak

We realize fairy tales are just rare dreams

And just like that, love is no longer deep infatuation

But rather something we know to seek the ends of the earth for.

#liveandlearn

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One Greatest Lesson I’m Crossing With To 2018: Listen To Yourself

It took me a long time to realize that you can do everything right and still end up unhappy. You can say all of the right things, do exactly as you are told, follow in the footsteps of all the people who swore by their success and their strategy surrounding it, and you can still end up displaced because you didn’t ever choose to simply listen to yourself.

The best thing I ever did for myself was simply listen to what I actually wanted. Then I messed up. I made mistakes that I’ll never forget. I hurt people I loved, and I got hurt. I had to learn about self discovery which isn’t comfortable. It can get ugly, it can get confusing. It’s hard. It’s difficult to confront yourself sometimes, it’s difficult to be the person who does things differently, who doesn’t settle.

But it’s the greatest gift I ever gave myself. It pushed me towards figuring out what my own personal version of happiness looks like. And I grew on my own terms, I figured out what actually matters to me, I carved my own path and I started to living on my own terms. I became the person I always wanted to be rather than the person I was always told to be. Life is about making yourself proud on your own terms. It’s about finding a happiness that works for you.

#liveandlearn

I Loved To Love

For a long time the who didn’t matter as much as the that. If he made me laugh, we’d often end up in bed (also, because of alcohol, but let’s not go there). I found that the humor, along with dancing, was a good indication of whether there was room for magic. For making love.

Many were lovers for a night, or for a few nights, but that was usually it. Yet over time that changed. I started realizing that I had seen bodies, felt bodies, but started missing the soul. I started to sense beyond the physical. I started to learn that love was different from sex…and that I was having sex, and not making love.

#liveandlearn

 

Things My Father Taught Me #1

Don’t be a doormat.

Don’t allow people to take advantage of you.

The problem with becoming tired of being a doormat,

is that you eventually become the polar opposite.

There’s no middle ground.

You become angry.

And anger within you is like a ticking time bomb.

If you let it tick for too long….

Sooner or later it is going to go boom.

And you will make some terrible decisions clouded by personal issues and anger.

You end up hurting people that care about you.

And put yourself in places where you have no business going,

and in the end, you hurt yourself.

      -Things My Father Taught Me

…thoughts!

Say you love me to my face
I need it more than your embrace
Just say you want me, that’s all it takes
Heart’s getting torn from your mistakes

‘Cause I don’t wanna fall in love
If you don’t wanna try,
But all that I’ve been thinking of
Is maybe that you might
Baby it looks as though we’re running out of words to say
And love’s floating away….

-Jessie Ware-

In response to Discover Challenge; Radical Authenticity

#LiveandLearn

 

jessie-ware

 

Only My Shadow Knows

 

shadow2

Lost, lost in the woods, in the dark,

Night full of stars.

Reflections all around 

But I don’t know which is mine.

Help! I’m screaming out 

but there’s no reply. 

I thought you will always be there for me.

I thought it was me and you against the world.

But empty promises you gave,

just to get into my pants. 

not knowing that

you will be the reason for my mind battles,

a love test that I never asked for.

Only my shadow knows, 

the thoughts and feelings I have for you

I hate you, I love you

Should I go or wait? 

I’m tired of running all alone in this woods. 

I might get lost forever,

and you will never see me.


In response to today’s Daily prompt: test

#LiveandLearn

 

Emotional Dilemma

Right now, she’s stuck somewhere in between “I care” and “I don’t want to care anymore”.

She’s stuck somewhere in between “I want to stay” and “I have every reason to leave”.

She’s stuck somewhere in between “We’ve been through too much for me to give up” and “I’ve been through enough to know I can’t take it anymore.”

She’s stuck somewhere in between “I don’t mind putting up with his bullshit because every couple fights” and I’m getting so sick of arguing and fighting with him”.

She’s stuck somewhere in between “Maybe things will be good again one day” and “Things will never be the way they used to be again.”

She’s stuck somewhere in between “I love him too much to let him go” and “I’m just done”.

It’s an interesting Dilemma and you are taking advantage of it.

In response to today’s Daily Prompt: Dilemma