Short Story: 2:00A.M. Dreams (Part 2)

Continuation of my story of how I felt when I lost my friend in 2009. I dream of him sometimes and thought I should write it down. Click here for Part 1


I pulled myself up onto the bed and hugged him. I did not want to let him go. I wasn’t ready. “I love you” my voice was shaking and my throat hurt from all the screaming and crying. I lay there sobbing on his still chest trying my hardest to find his heartbeat in the melancholy silence.

Suddenly, I felt someone’s hand on my shoulder. It was my best friend Ruth. She did not say anything. She just stood there, gazing pitifully into my eyes. I got up as she pulled me into her arms. “I’m so sorry” she whispered. That short cliche phrase caused an explosion in my chest. It was like a confirmation of what was happening and I just wasn’t ready to accept the truth.

‘No! this can’t be!” I cried still frozen in her hug. “I just can’t….I can’t do this without him.’

“I know it hurts…” her voice was very soothing. “But you can do it. We will do it together.”

When I met Antony, Ruth was always there when we had relationship issues. Yes, at some point in life, Antony and I dated.

“No…no” Every word was a struggle. “You don’t get it!” I cried.

“I do! I promise you that you’re strong enough to get through this. I know you loved him but he wouldn’t want to see you this way. He would want you to live on.” I could sense it was hurting her to see me this way. She slowly released me from her warm hug, back into the cold and bitter reality, taking a step back leaving me standing beside the metal hospital bed.

Once again, I gazed at Antony. I wanted to carve his face into my memory forever. His temp fade ragged black hair that when cut to perfection, made his dark eyes pop and sparkle like stars every time he saw me. His beautiful full lips that kissed me with so much love and tenderness, and his cute dimples every time he smiled at me. His big arms for a nineteen year old boy that kept me feeling safe in the darkest days and nights.

I can’t imagine not being able hearing his cute laugh, his sweet voice anymore. I will miss the goodnight calls and the morning texts. The way he used to pull me close and stare deep into my eyes. Those random hugs and kisses. He made me feel like I was the only girl in the world. When I was with him I felt like nothing else mattered.

I stood there motionless. For a second it was like time froze. The rain water from my braids was dripping down my spine. I could barely breathe from crying so much. The tears were still streaming down my face like tiny waterfalls and in my head, I kept replaying the moments I spent with him. Every flashback made me die a little more

How am I going to live without him? He was everything to me. He was my all.



Short Story: 2:00A.M. Dreams

The pain was unbearable. It was like someone stabbed me with a sharp knife and they were twisting  it in the wound. I ran out into the cold rain. It was pouring but I didn’t care. I kept running and running.

I tried to escape from the cruel and painful reality that was holding me in its tight grip. I wanted to run into his hospital rooms to see that everything is okay….that everything I’ve been told was a lie and that he was alright. The tears were rolling down my cheeks and I could barely breathe.

I ran into the hospital, searching for familiar faces. I wanted to ask someone about where he was but there was no one at the reception and so I decided to look for him myself.

I ran through the hospital pushing through everyone. When I finally spotted Antony’s parents, I stopped. The sight of them made my heart ache. Mrs. Tunde was locked tight in her husband’s arms, weeping loudly on his shoulders while he just sobbed comforting her.

When he noticed me, he looked at me and moved gently to the side revealing a door which hid a room full of sorrow. They didn’t have to say anything and I knew. I walked carefully to the door and pushed it open hoping that he won’t be there but the door revealed a bed where he was laying so lifelessly.

My knees felt weak. I just about managed to get to his bed before crumbling to the ground. I grabbed his ice cold hand and squeezed it but it didn’t squeeze back.

I cried. “No! It can’t be!” I could barely say the words. It’s like they were almost trapped in my throat. I kept trying to convince myself that it was all just a scary nightmare and that when I wake up, he’d be sitting in front of me with his angelic smile.

“Wake up! Wake Up!” I screamed at myself and closed my eyes tightly but when I opened them, I was still there in the melancholic room with magnolia walls and white polystyrene ceiling. There was a small window opposite the door. The raindrops were sliding down the glass making it look like a scene from a movie that every broken heart knows.

That’s all it felt like to me. A movie. It couldn’t have all been real. Could it? I felt like I wasn’t even controlling my body. I felt like I was just watching from a distance with the rest of the audience.

To the left of the window was a white machine. A machine that once recorded his heartbeat and that was once beeping along to the rhythm of his pulse…but now it was completely silent. Next to the machine was a low metal-framed bed. I looked at his beautiful face again. He looked like he was just sleeping and it almost seemed as though he was smiling. He lay still, in the snowy white sheets. I sat there beside the bed, our fingers still interlocked.

“Antony…Don’t do this to me” I cried out. “You promised…”My voice broke. “You promised you’d always be there! That you would never leave me!”


I lost a friend in 2009. Car accident tragedy. I have never talked about it ever since. Last night, I dreamed about him and the story did not exactly happen like that in 2009, but it happened like that in the dream. His face was the one in the bed. And I woke up with tears in my eyes.

Since I have never talked about it, I will formulate short stories about my feeling then….about I felt when I lost him.. My emotions, My pain, His funeral, My final Goodbyes….We were really close.

Names changed though!



Alex and I rekindle our friendship in December when on suspension through Facebook, exchanged numbers and since then we kept talking through calls and text messages. I kept postponing hooking up because of the situations at home. On the last weekend of January 2013, Monday Morning, my dad traveled to Bungoma for a week. I had the freedom to do whatever I wanted before he returned. Alex then invited me for house party at a friend’s house that Saturday night.

I threw on my skin tight blue cocktail dress with my black converse shoes. I was ready to let go that night, stress was building up and I could really use a drink. I tied my braids in a bun and did some very diva make up style before I left.

I took a cab to the party. Alex’s friend lived in the suburb neighborhoods in Nairobi, Kitusuru. I could hear music blasting all the way down the street. It felt like it was going to be a great night. I got out of the cab, paid the cab guy then walked up the drive way.

Was I late or what time did people start drinking? Some people were already blacked out. I was not even high. I looked at my phone clock, it was midnight. I walked into the kitchen and there she was. She was wearing a pair of blue jeans with a white button down shirt tucked in and a black and blue tie with white vans and a blue and black beanie. Of course, she looked beautiful just like I remembered. She looked up from her drink and smiled at me.

Nancy!” She called as she walked over to me. She was stunning. I don’t know why but my heart skipped a beat when she called my name. “Hi Alex” I said

“Is everything okay?” She hugged me. Once again sending shocks through my body. God! Why do I feel this way? I don’t understand. My thoughts.

“Do you wanna go somewhere more quiet?” Alex asked me grabbing my hand. I nodded my head and went with her but first she pulled out a half bottle of viceroy from a cabinet and put it under her arm.

We walked upstairs into the bathroom. Oh gosh what is happening Nancy. What are you getting yourself into? I thought to myself as I watched Alex close the door behind her and sat on the counter.

“So what have you been up to? We haven’t talked much since forever? What happened to you?” She asked as she poured a drink in her tumbler then handed it to me. ‘Take that shot!’

Truth be told, Alex and I used to friends back in Our Lady of Mercy Girl’s School in Busia. She was in form two when I joined form one. She was popular for being the best basketballer in school. When I joined, rumors were that she was lesbian and that she had a girlfriend in the upper class just because they were always together. I never dug for more information about her because I was a ‘fresher’. What do ‘freshers’ know apart from being bullied?

We kept in contact for a while after I transferred then later everyone moved on with their lives. We rekindle our friendship again after high school but some girl she was dating at that time broke up with her and Alex went spiraling downhill. She became a completely different person. And I couldn’t trust her anymore. So I cut her off.

“I’m fine. Life has been ups and downs but okay. The last time we talked you told me you were seeing a Kate! Right? You still together or you moved on?” I asked her as I sat on the edge of the sink then I took the viceroy shot.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       “Kate! Kate. That girl was something. We broke up three months ago. She was my longest relationship. Fuck!”She said as she looked at the closed door. I could see her eyes start to fill up with tears.

“Alex I’m sorry” I said as I got up to hug her. Realizing she was still hurt by Kate.

She wiped her eyes and smiled, “It’s all good, I will find someone better. Actually am here with a Jane. But it’s nothing serious.” She said as she looked up at me giving me a small smirk.

“Sorry that I hugged you.” I told her as I walked back over to the tub.

Nancy, its fine. It really is” Alex said as she walked over towards me. “Umm, Nancy, I’ve been meaning to tell you…” I cut her off.

“Alex let me just say that, first, you’ve known me for a while. Am still straight and I have been with boys. I’m not taken for now but yeah. We cannot be.” I said as I walked back over to the sink. Through the rekindling period, Alex had been flirting too much. I went with the flow hoping that we would not be meeting anytime soon. But there we were!

“Nancy, I’m sorry for what I’m about to do”. I went to turn around but that’s when it happened. I felt her lips press against my lips and her tongue slip into my mouth. Weirdly, I did not stop her. I kissed her back and grabbed her hips and pulled her closer. She moved her hands over my body and put me on to the sink. I wrapped my legs around her and began to kiss her neck. I grabbed her cornrows and yanked the down. She let out a soft moan. I could not help but smile.

“ALEX ARE YOU IN THERE?” We both froze.

“It’s Jane” Alex whispered.

I pushed Alex off me and quickly snapped back into reality. “I’m sorry Alex. I can’t do this”. I went to open the bathroom door but Jane beat me to it. She opened the door and right then you knew she was going to kill someone.

“Alex. What! What is going on? Why are you with that? “She said pointing at me.

“Jane I know it looks bad but let me….” She cut Alex off and continued to scream and yell at her till I stepped in.

“Jane, don’t blame Alex, It’s my fault. Okay” I defended Alex even though it was her fault.”So stop yelling and listen to your girlfriend for once.” I told Jane then walked past her.

“Am sorry Alex” I heard Jane say as I walked away from them.

“No Jane, you listen to me. It’s over. See what we had was never a relationship in the first place. Am sorry” Alex shouted. I think she shouted on purpose; for me to hear her.

I called a cab to take me home, looking at the clock in the car it was 3am. What! What a waste of a night. I thought to myself. As I got home, my phone vibrates a message from Alex. ‘You looked really good walking away. Hope you don’t mind finishing off where we started. Hope you got home safe.”

To be continued…..


Sponsors/Sugar Daddies are killing a generation.

This article was shared on a what’s app group am in and I thought I should share as my Motivational Monday to the ladies and also for parents and students. Some refers to them as sponsors or sugar-daddies but they are killing our generation. 


After classes on a Friday me and my friends had gone to a popular joint in Westlands. Four older gentlemen came over to our table and offered us drinks (proper drinks – not the drinks we were used to). We agreed and over the next 2 months it was play and fun. They would invite us to the hotels and have fun with us. Pay us well which I now know is prostitution.

The guy I landed on was nothing short of rich and he gave me pocket money unlike my dad who gave me $40 a month, he would give me $200 ever two weeks. I could get all the shoes and clothes I wanted. I was lucky enough to move from the hostels near Chiromo to a one bedroom in Parklands. 

At this point my boyfriend who was in JKUAT University and his small credit gifts meant nothing. All the time he visited me, he bought me a bag of chips and cheap bracelet’s and once in a while I would get phone credit worth Ksh 100 compared to the Ksh. 2000 phone credit and a trip to coast with a new one bedroom house.This University ‘bae’ had to go. He was not at my level anymore. The decision came hard because dating someone for 2 years and dropping them without and explanation is hard but once you taste the good money nothing can stop you.

My friends had noticed the changes; missed classes, empty hostel room and as all good friends they told me to take care of myself.

After 9 months of happiness, the guy changed. He would only see me on weekends or send his driver to pick me up. His driver was a kind guy and through him I learned the hard truth. My new man was married and had a daughter my age, apparently I was not the only girl the driver would pick up. He and his friends from the club had been doing the routine around Langata and Westlands where evidently all university girls stream to over the weekends.

I was angry at myself but then again the 42′ inch Samsung TV was delivered to my place the following Monday with an apology from my ‘hubby’. As I had grown to know him, to say I was stupid and blind would be an understatement.

Not long after November 6th, I got ill and was admitted to hospital. It was nothing major, the doctors said I needed fluids and I was discharged. The medication prescribed worked against me and I got worse. So ‘My hubby’ sent me some cash and his driver dropped me at Nairobi Hospital, they did some tests and the results were nothing short of dismantling. I was 2 months pregnant and HIV positive

After breaking the news to the guy he took off and said I had been seeing someone else. The following day, 8 guys showed up at my house with a moving truck, at this point you realize there is no difference between you and a visitor. Out went my beautiful TV, Couch, Queen Size Bed, my tables and carpets. I was left with clothes and some pair of shoes to my name. No money. No dignity and a pregnancy that came with disease.

With the Ksh 3000 I had I went back home and my mother knew immediately I was with a child. My father hasn’t spoken to me since then, it’s been 2 years now. I’m still HIV positive. My son is still here and the 1 year I enjoyed life with a married man, I lost school time, I lost a boyfriend who is now working and another woman is enjoying what was to be mine. 

My girls let me tell you out right, no man will look at you when you’re HIV positive with a child even those who used to buy you 50 bob credit and the cheap bracelets. Many of you who are in my shoes, leave before your life becomes a wish. I wish someone had told me.

You call them sponsors, we called them sugar daddies. The media has made them popular. Most of my friends are gone. Some are really sick with HIV. Family members use me as a negative example. 

Women work hard. Get a man you can lift. Be thankful for what you have. Don’t be greedy.Stick to the 200 bob credit and watch it grow to 1000 bob and more.

My Advice – Ladies, please stop wearing your heart between your legs. Your happiness can be found there too. So, if you keep on this track it will become bottomless pit of despair. Stop dangling the key to ‘unhappiness’ in your lap. Take care!

Share widely.




The Dream I keep Having. Does It Have Any Meaning?

Should I say good Morning or goodnight? It’s 3am in my country Kenya.Whichever time zone you in, ‘Jambo’ (Hello). 
I cannot sleep!
See, I had a very scary dream and it woke me up. Have you ever dreamt of falling into an endless hole? You just keep falling but you don’t hit the ground?I have been having the same dream for sometime now. Everything happens the same way. What does it mean?
I saw myself in a forest. I was lost. I could see that I was with my friends but now that am awake, I don’t remember their faces. I don’t even know who they were.I was dressed in ragged blue jeans, white sleeveless top, a black hoodie with a back pack and no shoes.
We were walking past a cementary and my friend, Nancy, said to me, ‘ Hey, there something behind you. Don’t move’. (In reality I don’t have a friend named Nancy.)
We all know when someone tells you not to move because of something that’s behind you, that’s when the fear jumps into you 110%. Nancy and my other friends were already moving back from what was behind me. I could see the scare in their faces. I was still glued to the ground sweating and panting really hard. I could hear myself.
So I just started running. I don’t know what I was running from but I could feel something breathing at my feet as I ran. Nancy and the others had taken a different road. But the creature that was, seemed to be wanting me. I couldn’t stop running. I kept telling myself, ‘it’s only a dream. It’s only a dream. I knew it was a dream but I couldn’t open my eyes.
I could feel myself stumble in bed and turning but it’s because I was dodging from the hanging branches on my path as I ran.
I had been running for so long when I suddenly tripped and fell in a hole. A dark hole. I saw nothing in there. But I just kept falling. I let my hands free to try hold on to something to stop me from falling but I couldn’t feel anything.‘It’s only a dream. Wake up. Wake up.’ I could hear my thoughts. But my eyes could not open. I tried but nothing.
Then I saw a light deep down the hole. As I fell, the light became bigger and brighter. I thought it was my way out. But just before I could see where the light came from or what it was, I heard a bang, I woke up. Someone in the house was using the washroom and the ‘bang’ was the toilet door.’
I woke up sweating and my heart pounding so hard. I rebuked the dream in the name of Jesus but I cannot sleep now. I believe that dreams that wake you up at night or those that you cannot wake up from, no matter how much you try are not good.
Have you ever had such a dream? The falling into a deep hole dream? What does it mean? It’s not the first time I have dreamt about it. Am scared!

Camp Hookups – Part 2

click here for part 1

Beep Beep. Her phone vibrated. It was a message from Justin.

‘Are you alone in your cabin? I’m coming over?’ It read.

He figured that she was alone in her cabin because her two friends, Talia and Maya, had come to the boys cabins which was 10 minutes away from theirs. 

When Justin and Andrew walked through the door, she knew something was about to happen. He walked over to her bed but Andrew stayed at the door as lookout.

He took his shoes off and climbed under the covers with her. He snuggled up really close to her but she started doing stuff on her phone to try avoid getting physical with him. It’s not that she didn’t want him. But she was scared of sex and she had high morals. She wanted to stay a virgin until marriage.

He snatches her phone and puts it under the pillow.

“Can I have a kiss” He asks.

“Sure” She leans in

She pecks him on his lips because she knows that if she gives him more it will lead to something more serious.

“Why do you keep stopping?” He asks grabbing her chin.

“I don’t know, I guess I’m nervous” She reply.

“There’s nothing to be nervous about” He says kissing her.

The kiss turned into making out and things escalates very quickly. She brushes her tongue on his upper lip as a tease. He let out a small groan and grabs her ass harder. His hand lowers to her thigh and he pulls off her shorts leaving her in her spanks. ‘Ha! Thought you were going to get me out of my pants.” She thinks to herself.

He pulls her leg over him motioning for her to get on top of him and she did.

He starts kissing and sucking on her neck. She let out a small moan. He then grabs one of her breasts and starts sucking. 

She begins to grind on top of him that she can feel his cock against her. They continue to kiss and fondle one another.

She then suddenly gets off from on top of him because she feels that things are going too far. She tops kissing him but he continues kissing her neck. He grabs her and inserts two fingers, “Shit” She says softly. Then pulls off his hand

She pulls off his shirt and began to lick him down. She does that to tease him because she really doesn’t plan on going any lower than his stomach. It’s torture because he knows she’s not about to give him head.

He then pulls her up and she gets back on top of him. Grinding. Faster and Faster as time goes on. Their making out gets more intense. She grabs his length and begins to rub on it through his pants.

He tries to pull it out that she feels it on her hand. It’s weird because she had never touched one before.

She then immediately pull her hand up and gets off him. ‘Damn! I just ruined the mood’ She said to herself

“What’s wrong?” He says concerned.

“I told you I’m not having sex with you’. She reply.

He laughs. “I wasn’t gonna put it in, just thought you might want to actually touch it. I told you that I respect your values. You don’t need to be scared I would never violate or hurt you. I don’t want you to be uncomfortable”.

She smiles.

He laughs again and leans in to kiss her. She couldn’t understand how the mood had been reset but she wanted him more than ever now. A respectful boy is such a turn on.

They make out some more. And then they just lay there in each other’s arms.

‘My perfect night’ Her thoughts.

It begins to rain. Andrew had already left without them noticing.

“You should go before it starts raining too hard”. She said.

” You sure? I could just stay with you if you want”.

“No its’ okay, I’m tired anyways.” She reply.

“Okay babe.” He says kissing her. “I really like you. Goodnight”

He then leaves.





Camp Hookups – Part 1


Selena has been crushing on Justin for too long but she had never expressed her feelings to him. He knew she liked him. He knew how she felt about him. And he had told his friends that he’s going to ‘hit that’ during the school camp get-away.

He was in the bad boy crew but he was the sweet and naughty kind. He cared about Selena and he did have feelings for her but only his best friend Andrew knew about it. 


Justin walks over to Selena and immediately she gets nervous. She knew what he’s going to say and try to get her to do. He always loved to play with her mind back in school. Teasing her, making her uncomfortable even with her friends around. 

She enjoyed it though. It kind of made her feel that he liked her too.

He comes up to her face and asks her to take a walk with him. They start walking to the cabin.

“Wassup” Justin says

“Um, nothing much I guess” She reply awkwardly.

“So what’s up with tonight?” He says as he wraps his arm around her waist.

“I don’t know, you tell me” She reply “We’re definitely not having sex though” She adds. 

A look of disappointment came over Justin’s face. She felt bad because she did not like to disappoint people.

“So what are we doing?” He replies.

“Um I don’t know we’ll see where the night take us” She says “and we’re not doing oral either” She adds.

“That’s fine, I’ll respect your wishes babe” he says.

‘Is this boy perfect or what? Any other boy would have found a sluttier girl to have sex with’, Selena’s thoughts.

They stop at the back door of the cabin.

“So, when do I get to kiss you?” Justin Says smirking.

“I don’t know, whenever you’re ready” She reply with a shy smile.

She was freaking out though. But to be honest she wasn’t ready, she had never kissed a boy. She was 16 and never been kissed.

Justin moves closer to her looking in her eyes.

“Oh crap” She thinks to herself

“How about now?” He says smiling

“Um…….” She’s cut off as he leans in.

They kiss.

‘His lips are so freaking soft. Why is he shoving his tongue in my throat?’ Selena’s thoughts.

She pulls away.

“I have never kissed a boy. You’re my first” She says biting her bottom lip.

“I sure can’t tell” he says smirking. 

He then leads her to the cabin.

“Oh shit, shit, shit” Her thoughts again.

She sits on her bed and looks in her phone. He comes to her and takes the phone from her and puts his number in her phone.

“So you can text me later tonight when you’re ready” he said smirking

“Okay” She says standing up.

He doesn’t move from in front of her so they were so close. He then kisses her again and grabs her ass. 

She pulls back.

“We should go back before people start suspecting stuff” She said and they walked out.



Last Night Confession

I dreamt about her last night. 


I thought she was my soul mate.

Our connection was very different compared to other people.

She was kind, humble and sweet. She cared about me. She was my best friend.

But I was attracted to her. 

I was attracted to her smile, the way she talked to me and how I felt when she was near me. I was attracted to her tattooed body.

She was a tom-boy.

She was dressed in khaki trousers and a white sweat-shirt, underneath it, she wore a black long t-shirt with white converse shoes. Her hair was braided in cornrows and she had a snap-back hat on.

I saw her through my bed room window, walking towards my house.

She had invited me for a dinner date then a night out at a concert with a musician she loved. 

As the taxi arrived to my front porch. She holds my hand and whispers to me, ‘You looking lovely, beautiful’.

I smiled back as I felt my heart sink.

She opened the door for me, we walked towards the taxi as she held me on my waist. I could feel her warm hands on my skin. It gave me chills.

I was dressed in a short black dress that showed a bare back with red converse shoes on, holding a black clutch bag under my armpits with my black jacket in my hands. My make up was simple with purple lipstick. 

She allowed me to enter the taxi first and she followed. 

“You clean up good. You look very nice in that dress”. She said as she leaned towards my face. One hand brushing softly on my back and the other on my thighs. My heart pounded so fast. Then I felt her lips on my lips.

“Doreen, Doreen’, I heard My Dad Calling. “Wake-up, its 6:00am. You know am to travel today. The taxi is waiting. Open the doors for me.” 

“Damn it!” My thoughts.








My mother’s Daughter


Just Yesterday

Growing up, I never thought that my mother was a PERSON . I could hear of her but not see her. She was just this entity called ‘MOM’.

She became a human being to me, knowing her,  when I was a teenager, after I left high school.


Once I began my life as a ‘grown up’, I understood as to why she gave me up. Not to an orphanage but to my father.


Before I met her

And why she never tried to contact me. Why she never asked about me. She was given orders and she had to make a choice. A better education for me or a life full of struggles. But I began to miss her. I think that’s when I finally got to know her, even though we could only see each other a couple of times a year. She lived in Shianda, in a manyatta house with her other family while I stayed with my father in a huge house with a huge stone fireplace in the middle living room and wrap-around bedrooms. 5 bed-roomed mansion. See, that’s the sacrifice she made for me. A better life than hers.


My father was my blessing. A good Samaritan. My hero.  My everything. He educated me. Fed me.


My father then and now.

Clothed me. Protected me from the enemies and tried as much as possible to get me whatever I wanted. He still does. Even though I was not close with him. I was safe. 

“He was my strength when I couldn’t weak, He was my voice when I couldn’t speak, He was my eyes when I couldn’t see. He saw the best there was in me. Lifted me up when I couldn’t reach. He gave me faith coz he believed. I’m everything I am because He loved me” – Celine Dion

When he met my mother, she was 18 years old and working for him. He had another family and children. But being the best father he is, he made sure all his children knew each other and grew up closer to him.

For the next years after high school. My mother and I became very close. She also had another family too. Another husband and kids. See how am between a big family. On my father’s side, I have 7 half brother/sisters and on my mother’s side I have 6 step bothers/sisters. Weirdly, I was the only one who was born alone. Meaning, no real sister or brother but that doesn’t matter, I got plenty.

I then went to university. Graduated for my degree course and she was the first person on


Mom and I on my graduation day

my list. She was a proud mother and she never regrets about the past. I turned out to be her biggest blessing. With the little job that I have, am able to help her whenever I can. She might still be living the struggling life but happier. Happier than before.



Now “Mom” is 42. We are closer than ever. She phones me often with the opening line, “Hi! It’s your daughter calling.”which I set for her.  She visited during the weekend. How exciting. From Thursday until yesterday. She traveled today. Just talking and seeing her always gives me peace. Hearing her voice around the house when I come from work, “Mum I missed you”. “I missed you too”. Feels good. I never grew up to that. She was never there. But I am grateful shes’s my mother. And my love for her is so deep.

I promised to share some photos with you on her recent visit. Just a few













There’s no benefit in pride.

She is 32 years old. Her and her ex husband started dating when she was in grade 12. She was 19 years old. They were best friends. She waited until he completed college and started working. Her family and his family then met. They got married and had a son. (7 years old now). 

Her husband was short tempered at times but their problems started when she wanted to make him feel he can’t control her. Everytime they argue, she would pack her bags, go to her family and explain. Her sisters would phone her husband and shout at him. If he was controlling her, she would always dare him for a divorce.  But she never wanted a divorce. She had pride and she never wanted to look like a loser in his eyes. 

One day she pushed him so hard that for the first time he beat her and locked her outside. She went to her family and they took him to the police. She wanted people to see that she’s being abused. And feel sorry for her. But to be honest, she used to abuse her husband emotionally.

He was arrested and detained. She was asked by his family to withdraw the case, they felt that what she was doing was wrong. Her husband was never a violent man, he did what he did because she pushed him to the wall. She withdrew the charges and they reconciled.

After 3 months, she packed her bags after a small issue and he remained alone. 

After two days she received a call that he is in hospital, her family told her that she shouldn’t go there because it will look like she’s begging him and her sisters believed his faking the illness. 

All this time, people felt sorry for her. She was like the one being abused. He spent a week in hospital. 

After he came out, she received a divorce summon. She wanted to say no to divorce but because of her pride, she wanted him to change his mind and beg her. She called him and said, “you will get the divorce because I Iive like am in hell”.

When they were in court, she wanted to make him pay, so she told the court that she needed his properties to be shared. To her surprise he openly told the court that whatever he and her had acquired together should be given to her, all he wanted was a divorce.They got divorced in 2009 July.

Now, her husband is getting married again, while she’s there wasted. Her family gossiped about her. She depends on what her ex gives to her son for survival. She realized she wasted her marriage.

To all the wives/girlfriends around the world: Be careful how you get advise. Don’t be cheated. Even her younger sisters are much more respected than her. Those who encouraged her to divorce are always bad mouthing her. 

It’s doesn’t matter how the situation is. I am not saying not to listen to advice but it’s all about YOU at the end of the day. Your choices. Your way. Your journey. Listen, but listen carefully. Think deep and see if it’s worth it. There’s no benefit in pride. 

This is a perfect example and advise to those dancing in some overrated ego.

Credit:Relationship Matters Forum. (I read this story and I had to share).